Monday, May 03, 2010

It's My Birthday

It's 2:30am on my 49th birthday and I can't sleep.  My mom fell last night, ended up in the ER, is now in ICU.   My sister just texted me to tell me they just put the purple DNR wristband on my mom. There's no sleeping now.

As I walk through the quiet house full of sleeping residents (save one), the only thing I can hear is the swooshing of the ventilator keeping my sweet Jack alive.  I can't help but wonder, will there ever come a day when I have to decide purple wristband for him?  Damn, life is complicated and complex and confusing.

As I wandered down the stairs, I was greeted with these:


and three really great birthday cards from five really wonderful people in my life.

On the other hand, life is beautiful and fun and great!

Happy Birthday to me.

(I really need to get some sleep. I promised myself a 5am workout at the gym and it's now T minus 2 hours .... think I'll make it?)

*************
Postscript: never made it back to sleep, but did make it to the gym :)

Thank you for the birthday wishes and well wishes for my mom.  You guys are the best!

13 comments:

Rachel said...

Happy birthday Ann! So sorry to hear about your mom's fall. Hoping she gets better, and you enjoy your day. Hope you slept in :)
You deserve an amazing day.

Christy said...

Happy Birthday Ann! I am sorry to hear about your mom. Is she awake at all? I hope she gets better, too.

I also hope you get to enjoy the rest of the day. You deserve a good birthday. Maybe you should write a post bragging about yourself. It could be therapeutic... and fun!

Happy Birthday!

Heather said...

I'm so sorry about your mom...that wrist band is the hardest thing. Truly.

I empathize with your feelings on Jack. I have thought those same thoughts...

But, happy birthday! I hope that you can continually see the beauty in the day.

And, I hope you got some much needed rest.

worthy said...

Happy birthday my friend! I am so sorry to hear about your mum, hope she gets better and you can all forget that wristband for the time being.

Hope you got some much needed rest - sleep is important, the gym can wait.

Lots of love
thinking of you today and always xxxxx

ssouth said...

Oh man, poor girl. I hope going to the gym felt good and let you escape a little. Hugs are with you on your journey. Ice cream for breakfast all around.

Anonymous said...

Happy Birthday! Sorry to hear about your mom. I hope she recovers from the fall. Enjoy your day. Maybe you can get to bed early as a birthday treat????
Kristy

Hope said...

Happy Birthday Ann! I'm so sorry to read about your Mom. I'm praying.

Tatia Strang said...

Sorry to hear about your Mom's fall. Happy birthday. I ope youare able to salvage some time for yourself!

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your mum Ann, hope she is doing better now. Thinking of you. Lots of love, Bea xxxx

Justin and Victoria Nelson said...

Ann, wishing you a very Happy Birthday!
I will be praying for your mom.
So happy that sweet Jack was at least sleeping soundly.
xoxo,
victoria

Anonymous said...

Sorry to hear about your mom. I hope she is doing better.

Happy birthday!

Hugs,

Sandra

CS said...

Happy Birthday Ann! And I'm so sorry about your mom. I hope your day was better after the gym. -Caty

Susan said...

Oh my goodness Ann! I only just saw this post. Happy Belated Birthday! I'm sorry to hear about your mom.